I want to tell you. . .

Have you ever had so much that you wanted to say, but had too much pride or were too embarrassed to say it?  There is soo much I want to say.  I'm screaming it in my mind. . .but if you look at me, all you will see is a placid smile.  There is so much I want to tell people. . .but I don't. . .I can't?  I'm afraid of your response.  I'm afraid of how you will judge me.  I'm afraid of what you will think and not say.  So the words are lost. . .and never spoken.  They disappear into emptiness because the words never existed. . .the thoughts might remain but even those will disappear.  Nothingness.