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Monday, July 19, 2010

The Grad Party

Well my grad party was a blast.  Thanks to everyone that came!!  I loved seeing people. . .and hugging people I don't really know haha.  So my ex boyfriend Chris's parents were the djs and it was so awesome seeing them.  I almost forgot how much I love that family.  After everyone left I was just there dancing with his parents and step brother for like an hour.  When I first saw them. . .it hurt.  I know that its been almost a year and I should stop being pathedic and stop feeling guilty. . .but its hard.  I have a boyfriend now who is amazing and so far its been great but its still hard to forget what I had with Chris.  Not only did I love him, but I loved his family.  I was a part of his and he was a part of mine.  Its been quite a while since I've seen his family and after I got past the hurt part, it was really awesome spending time with them.  They invited me up to the house before I go to college and I don't have to worry about seeing Chris because he is living with his aunt in queensbury for the summer.  I probably won't go because I will feel weird but I wish I could.  I love that whole family so much.  I miss seeing them regularly.  And ya, I miss Chris too. I've given up trying to talk to him after he blocked me for the 100th time.  I'm forcing myself to let go and just forget about it.  I know that I have something good now, but what Chris and I had once upon a time was special and its hard.  Hopefully I'll have something just as good, if not better, than what I had with Chris so I can FINALLY move on and stop being such a freak.  We'll see.