College: FMCC Edition

So I had my first class today: Intro to Sociology.  I have been very excited about starting school again and so far its been a good day.  I am currently sitting in the Library blogging :P  Well I have to say that FMCC is very different than Oneonta and Canajoharie as well.  My first class went well, but when I looked around at some of the people it was exactly what I expected to see at FM.  Maybe I'm wrong, but the majority of the students all resembled the students I went to high school with that skipped school every other day, had children in high school, and never did their homework.  I can't shake the feeling that FMCC is the college people go to because they're supposed to, not because they actually want to.  I'm trying to stay optimistic, and as I've said everything is going well so far, but I don't know.  It was also interesting because my friend Ashley's mom was also in my Sociology class and we sat next to each other.  I like her mom, but it was a very different experience going to school with my friend's mom haha.  So now I'm sitting in the Library and looking around. . .the Library is stuffed full of Asians.  I have never seen so many in my life.  I do enjoy the diversity because its something I never had in high school, but I find it interesting that they all gravitate to the library.  Thinking of Kelsey right now because she is the only Asian that I really know haha.  Well everything is going well, I'm going to go try to find my next class and go to lunch while I wait.  :)

My Heart Part IV

The ice gets thin between winter and spring.
I would not put my heart on a piece of thin ice.
I will keep it inside.
Where it is nice and warm.
Until I know its safe again.

My Birthday

So today is my 19th birthday. . .wow. . .I honestly never thought I would make it to 16 much less 19.  I think I'm starting to get to the point where birthdays aren't really that big of a deal anymore, they're just another day.  Honestly its all pretty much down hill from here for me because 18 was probably the best year of my life and now the only birthday I have to look forward to is 21 and by the time i'm 21 drinking won't be fun anymore lol.  Oh well, happy birthday to me. . .another year older and another year closer to needing a face lift haha :)

The Story

Alright so the majority of you already know that I've been dating this guy named Jason for nearly two weeks now. . .this is our story:
I went to a party with my brother Larry at my friend Jamie's house, it was her last night there and she had a bunch of people over, most of which I didn't know (but I know them all now haha) This is where I first met Jason.  I thought he was Jamie's boyfriend because I heard her mention a guy named Jay a few times and I just assumed so I didn't really pay any attention to him.  A few days later he added me on facebook and I saw that he actually wasn't Jamie's boyfriend, but I didn't really know him so I didn't talk to him and I still didn't pay him much attention.  Then he started talking to me and he convinced me to go to another party in Fort Plain.  I could tell he was flirting with me a little. . .but still didn't pay him much attention.  At the party he pulled this stupid move where he purposely walked right past me to talk to Larry so that he made sure that I noticed him, then he talked to me.  I noticed him alright, and his stupid little move.  I called him out on it a few days later and he admitted to it.  I don't remember how, but some where during all of this he got me to give him my number so we started texting and talking a bit more.  I wasn't really interested because I didn't really know him and what not.  Then one night, I went on a date with a different guy and Jason asked me how it went.  I told him it went poorly and that the guy didn't have any class or manners, thats when he decided to ask me to dinner so that he could show me how I should be treated.  I was flattered, but I wasn't interested so I used the excuse that I didn't really know him, his response was that we could change that and get to know each other better and I agreed.  Well obviously I got to know him better and in that time I started to like him and then fell flat on my face.  I think its funny because although I was sort of looking for someone, I wasn't looking for him, nor was I interested in him when he first expressed interest in me. . .but I am so happy that we met and that he added me on facebook and started talking to me.  I am a very happy and lucky girl to have Jason.  Thats our little love story <3

Take My Hand

Take my hand my love
I want to take this walk with you
I want to take each step with you
If you fall, I will be there to help you back up
If we fall together, lets lay in the grass and laugh about it
If I fall, will you kiss my scrapes?
Take my hand my love
Look at the scenery
Look at the sky
Watch the day change from morning to night
Watch the seasons change from winter to fall
Take my hand my love
I want to take this walk with you

Happy Birthday Jessie

So today would have been Jessie's 20th birthday.  For those of you that haven't been reading my blog for very long, Jessie is my cousin and she passed away November 6, 2007 in a car accident.  We were very close and her death has had a HUGE impact on my life. . .I go to the cemetary twice a year: November 6th and January 4th.  This year. . .I almost forgot her birthday.  I remember thinking about it towards the end of december, but somehow it slipped my mind until last night.  I started bawling when I remembered because I hated myself for nearly forgetting.  I am petrified of forgetting her. . .I guess I still haven't let go and I'm not sure I ever will or if I even can.  Not a day goes by that I don't think about her and remember her. . .not a day goes by that it still doesn't hurt.  There are still days that I cry when I think of her and when it hurts so bad I have to drag myself out of bed in the morning.  I'm not sure its ever going to be REALLY okay. . .but I'm not even sure I would ever want it to be.  I don't want to forget her.  I don't want to lose her in a sense. . .I feel like if it started to really be okay, that would mean I was forgetting her and she was drifting into the back of my memory. . .I don't want that.  I want to remember her.  I still remember the sound of her voice and her smile and her laugh. . .oh Jessie, I miss you like hell and love you so much.  I wish you were still here with me.  Rest in Peace hun. 

Goal Reached!!

So my 5000-hits-by-Midnight goal was reached!!. . .as far as I know :P At midnight last night I wasn't exactly at my computer to check. . .no I was brining in the New Year the right way :) but when I checked this morning, I had well over 5000 hits so I will assume that I reached it haha!!  HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE AND THANKS TO EVERYONE THAT HELPED ME GET 5000 HITS, I REALLY APPRECIATE IT.

Happy New Year!!!

Lets make it a good one!!

New Years Resolutions

So believe it or not, it is nearly 2011. . .Where did 2010 go?  I still remember New Years last year. . .I had to say goodbye to my Fiance as he left, once again, for bootcamp.  My how things have changed.  I'm almost positive I made a New Years Resolution last year. . .but to be honest with you. . .I don't remember what it was and I probably didn't fulfill it :P  So this year, I've decided NOT to make a New Years Resolution that I won't remember at the beginning of 2012.  Instead, I'm just going to close my eyes, cross my fingers, and hope that 2011 is as memorable and interesting as 2010.  :)

My Heart Part III

My heart is fragile. . .like the wings of a butterfly.
My heart breaks. . .it shatters like glass.
The pieces scatter with each new break.
Pieces are missing.
But its okay. . .
My heart has been glued back together many times.
Missing pieces have been filled by the hearts of others.
My heart may be broken.
But it's beautiful like stained glass.
Handle with care.