The Journey to Me

I recently discovered that I don't know what I want to be, who I want to be, or even who I am.  So I made that my mission, to find out all of those things.  But where to start?  Well I took a few online tests, they all told me I should be either a counselor or work in business. . .well I decided I didn't want to be in school until I'm in my 30's working on my doctorate, but business has been a possibility for a while now.  I also started making some goals for myself, such as: transfer to SCCC, get my associates degree, get a better job, etc.  If anyone has any suggestions, feel free to comment. . .at this point I need all the help I can get!

College: Nursing Program Part II

Mood: Pretty damn ticked off

Weather: Cloudy, windy, cool

So yesterday afternoon I got a phone call at home from one of my nursing instructors.  On the first test, if anyone scored below an 80 they had to come in either individually or in a group for remediation, which I did.  In doing so you were supposed to create a plan of things you were going to do to improve for the next test, which I did.  But then she wanted us to either come in or email her to let her know if we were actually doing that.  I received the email but I had chosen not to respond yet, not knowing there was some sort of due date.  So she called me telling me that I failed to come in and ignored her emails.  She was exceptionally rude over the phone and ended the conversation by saying she was going to tell my other instructor that I failed to come in for remediation for the first test and then hung up on me. . .I find that extremely unprofessional, not to mention I wasn't aware I was still in high school where my instructors chase me down to make sure I'm studying and doing my work.  I thought once you were in college doing those things were up to you.  I'm paying for the class and its my grade so if I want to study, that's my choice. . .I don't need my instructor calling me at home with an attitude to see if I'm studying and then hang up on me. . .If she really had to call me out she could have sent it via email, she didn't need to call my phone, at home, to be rude and hang up on me. . .very unprofessional and uncalled for.  I live in Schenectady, I work, and I attend two other classes aside from nursing.  I practically live at the college as is and all of this mandatory remediation is ridiculous.  I think its wonderful that they offer the programs but making it mandatory isn't necessary.  I did appear for the remediation but I shouldn't have to keep checking in to let them know if I'm studying or not. . .as I said, this isn't high school and it is my responsibility to do it on my own.  I'm done ranting now.  

College: Nursing Program

Alright. . .here it goes: I've decided I don't want to be a nurse.  I am not continuing this program following this semester.  I am way to stressed out all the time to do this for two years, my body aches, I have headaches and I just feel sick all the time.  Not to mention that no matter how hard I try I can't seem to do well.  I have to have a minimum of a 78 overall in order to get into nursing II. . .I honestly don't even see that happening.  Which is heartbreaking because I've never been unable to do well in a class and I work harder at this than I have ever worked for anything else.  I can't handle the stress, I don't want to be a nurse, and I highly doubt I will pass.  Truth is, I don't really know who I am or what I want to be when I grow up.  I hate admitting that and it scares me.  I'm almost 20. . .time is going by so fast and I'm sitting here spinning in circles.  I think I'm going to transfer to SCCC next semester for either liberal arts or business and get a full-time, or almost full-time job.  *sigh*

The Costumer :)

Mood: So far so good, but I haven't had class yet :P

Weather: Cool, windy, cloudy

 So I got the job at the Costumer.  I'm working at the big corporate office where they do all of their shipments for shows, alteration, retail, and office work.  They're starting me out in wardrobe and they will move me around as needed.  They had me work at the Colonie Center store yesterday and I loved it.  I almost wish I could just stay there :P.  I saw several people I know there, which is strange because its about an hour from where I grew up and went to high school :P  I'm just glad for something different other than restaurant work.  Wish me luck :)

What I Learned In Nursing School Is. . .

 

Its not as bad as it looks, I swear.  :P We are learning about inserting catheters and we thought it would be better if we had an actual person instead of a penis sitting on a pillow :P I love how hands on nursing is lol.

Living With A Boy: CJ Part II

Mood: Stressed to the max

Weather: Warm Fall day :) 

There are lots of things that my boyfriend does that bug me. . .lots.  But whenever he does something new that drives me crazy, I always explain calmly how it makes me feel and why he shouldn't do that.  Its after the first time that I bitch and nag about it like any other female :)  For example, the other day I asked CJ not to leave the dish cloth all wadded up on the sink after he is done using it because it will start to stink and it won't dry. . .He swore left and right that he doesn't do that and he always hangs it up.  Okay, fine. . .Well this morning, guess what I found?? 

Dish cloth all wadded up on the sink. . .AND!!!!. . .

A wadded up dish towel. . .

I have proof dammit lol!  <3 ya babe, regardless. x