Dear Knight In Shining Armor,
Why do you make me wait? Why am I sitting here, and you there? I need you next to me, beside me, part of me. I need to feel your warmth, your body, your heartbeat. I need to know that you love me and that I don't wait in vain. Please don't make me wait anymore, close the distance between us. Kiss my lips, let me taste you, your love, your lust, your passion. Let me lay in your arms as well as your heart. Let me feel your finger tips pressing on my body. I want to trace lines over your entire body. I want to watch you while you sleep. Please don't make me wait any longer dreaming, fantasizing. Make my dreams a reality. Let me be everything you've ever wanted and more, and make you the happiest Knight of all. Let me do that. . .that is all I ask. I love you dear Knight, as I always have.
Monday, December 14, 2009
I Can No Longer Write
I can no longer write
about the sun in the sky
the moon and the stars
the water in your eye.
There is no more darkness
and yet no more light
not in my head or on paper
I can no longer write.
No emotion or feeling
no pain nor love
no words come from my mouth
no sounds from up above.
It no longer comes to my hands
mouth, eyes, or ears
it doesn't come to me anymore
like in previous years.
Perhaps it is me
or maybe it was you
but I cannot write beautiful things
that come out of the blue.
Instead my hands and mind argue
how they yell and they fight
about the nothingness that comes
I can no longer write.
about the sun in the sky
the moon and the stars
the water in your eye.
There is no more darkness
and yet no more light
not in my head or on paper
I can no longer write.
No emotion or feeling
no pain nor love
no words come from my mouth
no sounds from up above.
It no longer comes to my hands
mouth, eyes, or ears
it doesn't come to me anymore
like in previous years.
Perhaps it is me
or maybe it was you
but I cannot write beautiful things
that come out of the blue.
Instead my hands and mind argue
how they yell and they fight
about the nothingness that comes
I can no longer write.
Rain
When it pours all over the world,
I'm there to catch the drops.
I rock away the thunderous cries
and the fits of lightening.
I rub until the clouds disappear
until it is once again silent.
But when my rain clouds burst,
the world runs away.
I'm left alone to my shaking thunder
while my clouds hang low.
Then hold myself until I drift away,
another storm for the world tomorrow holds.
I'm there to catch the drops.
I rock away the thunderous cries
and the fits of lightening.
I rub until the clouds disappear
until it is once again silent.
But when my rain clouds burst,
the world runs away.
I'm left alone to my shaking thunder
while my clouds hang low.
Then hold myself until I drift away,
another storm for the world tomorrow holds.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Tattoo
This is similar to the tattoo i want. I want an all blue star with white and black angel wings on my ankle. I don't want the halo though. What do you think??
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Soldiers Silent Night
There was a link to this video in a forum of a website I go on a lot. . .its very meaningful and made me cry for obvious reasons. I thought I would share it with you because it has a great message.
Oh How The World Might Be
So I had to write this play for AP English. . .and the day before I wrote it I still had no ideas, but once I started I couldn't stop. I am really impressed with it so I decided to post it on here. I hope you guys like it and I would appreciate comments and critiques!!!
Characters:
Olivia- lead character, age 16-17
Debbie- Olivia’s mother
James- Olivia’s father
Nikki- Olivia’s younger sister
Drew- Olivia’s younger brother
Mr. Wright- Olivia’s basketball coach
Mrs. Parfait- Olivia’s English teacher
Mr. Stalwart – Olivia’s boss
Amy- Olivia’s best friend, she is around the same age as Olivia
Devon- Olivia’s boyfriend
Act 1
Scene 1
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. There is a couch up stage center with a coffee table near by. The front door is stage left, and the door that leads anywhere else in the house is stage right.
Olivia-(enters from stage left in a huff, she drops her bags on the floor and rushes to the couch. She lies down and puts her hands on her face.) Ugh!
Debbie-(enters from stage right with a laundry basket in her hands overfilled with clothes.) Oh good, you’re home. How was school today?
Olivia sits up on the couch with her hands on her head to portray her stress. Then both Olivia and Debbie freeze on stage and the stage goes black. Mr. Wright, Mrs. Parfait, Mr. Stalwart, and Amy enter in the dark. Mr. Wright stands down stage left, Mrs. Parfait stands down stage left of center, Devon stands down stage center, Mr. Stalwart stands stage down stage right of center, and Amy stands down stage right. They stand in the dark until the spot light only shines on Mr. Wright.
Mr. Wright- Olivia, you need to be practicing more outside of school. I don’t know what’s been going on with you lately. You’re not playing hard enough and you’re not focused. You’re on varsity, you need to live up to that or I’m going to have to take you off the team. You understand that don’t you?
The spot light goes out and then shines on Mrs. Parfait.
Mrs. Parfait- Olivia, where is your homework? This is the third time in the last 2 weeks that you haven’t had your homework and haven’t been prepared for class. You’re in AP, this is a college level class. We are trying to prepare you for college; you can’t do this sort of thing there. What’s going on with you? You have another 2 essays to do tonight, and you still have 4 other essays to make up from earlier this week.
The spot light goes out and then shines on Devon.
Devon- Listen Olivia, I don’t think we can keep going out. You’re just too busy for me and I’m feeling really neglected. You’ve been so distant lately; I don’t even feel like we’re dating anymore. So, I’m sorry, it’s over. I want to tell you myself about something else too, so it doesn’t shock you later. . .I’m seeing someone else.
The spot light goes out and then shines on Mr. Stalwart
Mr. Stalwart- (angry) Olivia, do you see what time it is? You are fifteen minutes late again! This has to stop! Do you understand that other people can’t leave until you show up? Ugh, listen, I have 3 people going on vacation next week so I’m going to need you to work every day after school and your normal hours on the weekend. You better be on time!
The spot light goes out and then shines on Amy
Amy- So listen, I really need your help with my math homework this week. Oh, and have I told you about me and Jason? Yeah, we broke up last night. Ugh, I am so stressed out about it. I thought he was the one, you know I really did. We were so perfect. He keeps accusing me of cheating, it just broke my heart. I’m so glad that I have you here to talk to, you’re the best. So about my math homework, do you think you can come over tonight so we can work on it?
The spot light goes out, Mr. Wright, Mrs. Parfait, Devon, Mr. Stalwart, and Amy walk off the stage and the lights come back up. Debbie and Olivia unfreeze.
Olivia-(she sighs) It was fine mom.
Debbie- That’s good. I really need your help. Could you finish up the laundry and fold it? And I could really use your help with dinner after that.
Olivia-(without emotion) Yeah, sure mom.
Blackout
Scene 2
The scene opens to Olivia sitting in the living room on the couch. She has piles of homework in front of her, and the clock behind the couch reads 11:00 P.M. The couch is moved to stage right and it appears to be cut in half. Amy is sitting on a chair on stage left painting her nails. The girls are on the phone with each other.
Olivia- I don’t know what to do Amy, I am just so overwhelmed with everything. With work, homework, basketball, school, Devon breaking up with me, stuff at home. It’s awful! I can’t handle it, but I don’t have a choice. It’s not like I can stop going to school or work. What do I do Amy; I’m like going to have a nervous break down or something?
Amy- Oh, I know what you mean girl. I mean, I don’t have as much stuff going on as you, but I get overwhelmed with the stuff I have to do. Sometimes life just sucks. Can you believe that Jason and I broke up? I am still in shock.
Olivia- Yeah, well Devon left me too, and then told me that he was already seeing someone else. I hate guys sometimes. I hate life right now. I wish I could just drop everything and get away. What do you do when you get overwhelmed? I need help Amy.
Amy- Haha, I usually get a beer and just chill. Jason would usually smoke pot or something stupid like that. That stuff is horrible for you and smells awful. I would just drink a beer or some vodka and after a while, it would all be good.
Olivia- Yeah, not happening. My mom would kill me if she caught me drinking. Any other suggestions?
Amy- I don’t know what to tell you Olivia. Why don’t you go out with me tomorrow night and I’ll get you drunk. It will be fine and your mother will never find out. I promise you will feel better. You just feel so happy when you’re drinking.
Olivia- I don’t think so Amy. I had better go; I have so much homework to do tonight. I’ll see you tomorrow.
Amy- Alright girly, have fun. Don’t forget to meet me at my locker tomorrow morning.
Blackout
Scene 3
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. The couch is up stage center in its original position. The piles of homework are still all over the coffee table and Olivia is asleep on the couch. There is a bottle of what appears to be some form of alcohol on top of one of the piles of homework and it is almost empty. Nikki and Drew enter from stage right. They are all ready for school and wearing their backpacks.
Nikki- Is Olivia sick? Is she not going to school today?
Drew- I don’t know. Maybe we should wake her up.
They both walk over to Olivia and Drew shakes her to wake her up.
Drew- Olivia, wake up. Are you going to school today? We have to leave in 5 minutes or we’re going to be late.
Olivia- (Still pretty much asleep and very out of it. It is noticeable that she has a hangover) Ughhh. Shhhh. What time is it? (She doesn’t move)
Nikki- Its 7:30. Are you okay Olivia? You look pale.
Olivia- (she starts to get up) I don’t know. I’m not feeling very well. I think I’m going to throw up and my head is killing me. (She remembers the bottle, grabs it, and hides it behind her back. Nikki and Drew don’t seem to notice.)
Drew- Maybe you should stay home. I’ll call mom and tell her.
Olivia- No! No, Drew. I’m fine. I’ll go to school. Let me go get ready. You guys take the bus today alright? I’ll drive myself that way if I’m late you guys won’t be.
Nikki- Are you sure? If you’re sick you really should stay home. You don’t look good at all. Mom wouldn’t mind if you stayed home.
Olivia- No. I have to go. Just go get on the bus. I’ll see you guys later.
Nikki and Drew give up trying and exit stage Left. Olivia starts massaging her head to try to ease her headache. She then grabs her mouth and stomach as if she is going to be sick and runs off stage right.
Blackout
Scene 4
The scene opens to Amy and Olivia standing in front of a set of lockers. A few other students are standing around talking as well.
Amy- So Jason tried texting me this morning. What is his issue? He breaks up with me yesterday and then begs for me to come back to him this morning. That boy needs to make up his mind. But of course I took him back. He’s just too cute to say no to, and I swear I’m going to be with him for like . . . ever. (She finally looks up at Olivia who is still very pale, her hair is a mess, and her make up is smeared) Wow . . . you look awful. Are you okay? Did you sleep last night? Are you sick?
Olivia- Something like that.
Amy- What do you mean? Are you okay? Talk to me!
Olivia- (She sighs) I listened to your advice last night. I drank almost an entire bottle of. . .I’m not even sure what it was. It tasted awful at first, but after a while I couldn’t stop and then I just passed out. I woke up this morning feeling awful. I still feel awful. Amy, I thought you said I would feel better? I feel worse!
Amy- You have a hang over Olivia. It happens when you drink too much. Just drink a lot of water and you’ll be fine. You don’t feel great now, but didn’t you feel good last night? Didn’t you feel relieved?
Olivia- Well . . . I’m not sure I remember. All I know is I didn’t finish my homework so I’m in big trouble.
Amy- Haha, you’re so funny sometimes. So do you want to go out tonight? I’m sure I could hook you up with one of Jason’s friends.
Olivia- I don’t think so Amy. I don’t ever want to drink again, after today I am never touching another drop of alcohol. Ugh.
Amy- I promise you get used to it, and it’s not so bad after a while. But I understand that you’re busy. But really girl, I think you should go take a look at yourself in the bathroom. Did you even look at yourself this morning? You’re a mess!
Olivia- I was in such a rush I didn’t have time really. Not to mention the light hurts my head even more!
Amy- (Randomly) Why don’t we cut school today?
Olivia- WHAT?
Amy- Yeah, we could both use a break. Why don’t we just go hang out some where? It would give you time to finish your homework and get over your hangover. You really need a day off.
Olivia- Do you know how much trouble we could get it? Besides, if I miss a day of school to do my homework, I will have even more homework by not being here. Since when do you skip school anyways?
Amy- Well I’ve never actually done it before, but I think we deserve it. It could be fun and who else would I want to spend my day off with than my best friend!
Olivia- Oh, I don’t know Amy. . .
Amy- Come on, you know you want to. Heck, you know you need it!
Olivia- Alright, but just this once. This is the first and only time okay?
Amy- Yes! Okay, definitely. Let me just call Jason to see if he wants to come along. Maybe he’ll bring one of his friends. (she puts her cell phone to her ear and starts talking to Jason) Hey baby, I was just wondering. . .
Olivia- . . . but I thought . . . oh never mind. (She sighs)
Amy- Okay great, we’ll meet you out by my car. Love you Pooky, kiss kiss.
Blackout
Scene 5
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. It is dimly lit to show that it is late at night and the clock reads 11:00 P.M. Olivia enters from stage left tip toeing in and trying to be as quiet as possible. She closes the door quietly and as she does that the lights come up to show that her mother has turned on the light. Debbie comes in and stands center stage. She is very upset and is wearing a long bathrobe. Olivia looks at her mother and knows she is in trouble.
Debbie- Where in the world have you been?
Olivia- (slurring her words and acting very drunk) Out with Amy.
Debbie- Why didn’t you call? You know your coach called me. He is very upset and may kick you off the team for missing practice. You didn’t tell me how much trouble you have been having with basketball. Where were you all night? I was worried sick! I was almost ready to call the cops!
Olivia- I was out with Amy mom, I’m fine. I’m gonna. . .I’m gonna go to bed now. G’night.
Debbie- Not so fast. What is going on with you? (Walks up to Olivia) You don’t look so good, are you feeling alright?
Olivia- Yeah mommy, I’m fine. I’m sleepy. I’m gonna go to sleep now.
Debbie- Why do I smell alcohol on your breath? Have you been drinking?
Olivia- Never! No, I’m not drinking at all!
Debbie- Oh my god, Olivia you’re drunk! What is the matter with you? Where have you been all night?
Nikki and Drew enter from stage Right
Nikki- What’s going on? Why were you yelling mommy? Is everything alright?
Debbie- Everything is fine Nikki, just go back up to bed. You both have school in the morning.
Drew- Is Olivia sick? She didn’t look so good this morning. She said her head hurt and she felt like she was going to throw up.
Debbie- What? Olivia, were you hung over this morning? What is going on here? I demand that you tell me right now!
Olivia- Nothing is going on. I’m just tired. You’re not listening. I’m not sick, I’m perfect! I’m absolutely perfect mom! (she begins to laugh hysterically)
Nikki- Mommy, what’s wrong with Olivia? Why is she acting funny?
Debbie- Nikki, Drew, go upstairs. I have to talk to Olivia. Go to bed.
Nikki and Drew look at each other with looks of concern and then turn and exit stage Right.
Olivia- Mom, I don’t feel. . .so good.
Debbie- What the hell were you thinking? Going out drinking on a school night? Coming home drunk? What has come over you? I don’t even know what to say or do.
Olivia- I think I’m going to be sick.
Debbie- You’re so grounded! You will not be going anywhere except for school, work, and practice. Do you understand me? And you will be bringing your brother and sister to school everyday from now on. There will be no cell phone and no seeing Amy for a while. I just don’t even know what to do with you. I am so disappointed Olivia.
Olivia- Mom! (Olivia runs off stage right covering her mouth and stomach. Debbie is seen holding her head in defeat and then all you hear from off stage is a loud Blegh!)
Blackout
Scene 6
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. Olivia is sitting on the couch crying. The pile of homework is back on top of the table. The clock behind the couch reads 7:00 A.M.
Olivia- I don’t know what to do! I can’t handle this anymore. Nothing is getting better at all. This is only getting worse. Think Olivia, think! How stupid can you be? I am so stupid! How could I do this to myself? How could I do this to my mother? What am I doing! (She sobs) Okay, pull it together Olivia. How can I fix this? What do I do? (She sobs) Okay. I’ll quit the basketball team! No. . . I can’t do that. They need me. I need basketball for college. I could quit my job! No. . .I can’t do that either. I need the money for my car and they need me there too. I can’t let them down like this. Well I can’t quit school. (She picks up a bottle of alcohol that was on the floor and takes a big sip. Then looks at the bottle.) Why am I drinking this? Why am I doing this to myself? Alcohol has only made everything worse! Okay, that I can do. This is the last time I am going to drink. THE LAST TIME! Then I will really focus. Basketball season is almost finished. I can do this. I can do this. I just need to take a step back and focus. (She looks at the bottle) The very last time! Olivia, you can do this. It’s going to be alright. (She chugs down the rest of the bottle.)
Nikki and Drew enter from stage right all ready for school again.
Nikki- Are you ready Olivia?
Drew- Are you alright? Have you been crying?
Olivia- (She wipes her eyes and hides the bottle in the couch) Yeah, I’m fine. Let’s go guys.
Debbie enters from stage right.
Debbie- (To Olivia) Good, you’re up. Remember, come right home after school.
Olivia- I will mom.
Nikki, Drew, and Olivia exit stage left. Olivia had left her backpack on the floor by the coffee table and Debbie notices it and picks it up.
Debbie- (Walking off stage left yelling) Olivia! Wait! You Left your backpack!
A car crash is heard.
Debbie- (Yelling, and in hysterics) No! Olivia! No!
Blackout
Scene 7
The scene opens to Debbie, James, Amy, Mr. Stalwart, Mr. Write, Mrs. Parfait, and Devon all standing around a coffin. They are all wearing a black for the funeral. They are all crying.
Amy- (To Debbie and James) I am so sorry. This is all my fault. None of this would have happened if it weren’t for me.
Debbie- It’s not your fault Amy. No one caused this, and no one could have stopped this (She sobs)
James- Why didn’t you tell me what was going on Debbie? I’m their father! You should have called me as soon as you found out she was drinking. Maybe I could have done something.
Debbie- I’m sorry! Okay! I didn’t know how bad it was. I didn’t know what to think. This is all my fault okay? Our baby. . .our children. . .I didn’t do enough. I’m a horrible mother. (She sobs)
James- How are Nikki and Drew?
Debbie- Not good. They’re both in a coma and the doctor said they may never wake up, and if they do they will both have severe brain damage. What am I supposed to do James? All my kids are . . . what do I do?
Amy, who has been listening to the conversation, runs off stage left.
James- I don’t know Debbie. I don’t know. (He sighs) It’s going to be alright. We’ll get through this. Nikki and Drew are going to make it. It’s going to be alright. (He hugs her.)
Debbie- (She walks up closer to the coffin and puts her hand on it) I love you Olivia. I’m sorry that I didn’t see what was going on. I’m so sorry. I’m going to miss you baby girl. We all will. I love you. (She sobs.)
Everyone walks off stage right and the lights dim. The spot light is left on the coffin.
Blackout
Characters:
Olivia- lead character, age 16-17
Debbie- Olivia’s mother
James- Olivia’s father
Nikki- Olivia’s younger sister
Drew- Olivia’s younger brother
Mr. Wright- Olivia’s basketball coach
Mrs. Parfait- Olivia’s English teacher
Mr. Stalwart – Olivia’s boss
Amy- Olivia’s best friend, she is around the same age as Olivia
Devon- Olivia’s boyfriend
Act 1
Scene 1
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. There is a couch up stage center with a coffee table near by. The front door is stage left, and the door that leads anywhere else in the house is stage right.
Olivia-(enters from stage left in a huff, she drops her bags on the floor and rushes to the couch. She lies down and puts her hands on her face.) Ugh!
Debbie-(enters from stage right with a laundry basket in her hands overfilled with clothes.) Oh good, you’re home. How was school today?
Olivia sits up on the couch with her hands on her head to portray her stress. Then both Olivia and Debbie freeze on stage and the stage goes black. Mr. Wright, Mrs. Parfait, Mr. Stalwart, and Amy enter in the dark. Mr. Wright stands down stage left, Mrs. Parfait stands down stage left of center, Devon stands down stage center, Mr. Stalwart stands stage down stage right of center, and Amy stands down stage right. They stand in the dark until the spot light only shines on Mr. Wright.
Mr. Wright- Olivia, you need to be practicing more outside of school. I don’t know what’s been going on with you lately. You’re not playing hard enough and you’re not focused. You’re on varsity, you need to live up to that or I’m going to have to take you off the team. You understand that don’t you?
The spot light goes out and then shines on Mrs. Parfait.
Mrs. Parfait- Olivia, where is your homework? This is the third time in the last 2 weeks that you haven’t had your homework and haven’t been prepared for class. You’re in AP, this is a college level class. We are trying to prepare you for college; you can’t do this sort of thing there. What’s going on with you? You have another 2 essays to do tonight, and you still have 4 other essays to make up from earlier this week.
The spot light goes out and then shines on Devon.
Devon- Listen Olivia, I don’t think we can keep going out. You’re just too busy for me and I’m feeling really neglected. You’ve been so distant lately; I don’t even feel like we’re dating anymore. So, I’m sorry, it’s over. I want to tell you myself about something else too, so it doesn’t shock you later. . .I’m seeing someone else.
The spot light goes out and then shines on Mr. Stalwart
Mr. Stalwart- (angry) Olivia, do you see what time it is? You are fifteen minutes late again! This has to stop! Do you understand that other people can’t leave until you show up? Ugh, listen, I have 3 people going on vacation next week so I’m going to need you to work every day after school and your normal hours on the weekend. You better be on time!
The spot light goes out and then shines on Amy
Amy- So listen, I really need your help with my math homework this week. Oh, and have I told you about me and Jason? Yeah, we broke up last night. Ugh, I am so stressed out about it. I thought he was the one, you know I really did. We were so perfect. He keeps accusing me of cheating, it just broke my heart. I’m so glad that I have you here to talk to, you’re the best. So about my math homework, do you think you can come over tonight so we can work on it?
The spot light goes out, Mr. Wright, Mrs. Parfait, Devon, Mr. Stalwart, and Amy walk off the stage and the lights come back up. Debbie and Olivia unfreeze.
Olivia-(she sighs) It was fine mom.
Debbie- That’s good. I really need your help. Could you finish up the laundry and fold it? And I could really use your help with dinner after that.
Olivia-(without emotion) Yeah, sure mom.
Blackout
Scene 2
The scene opens to Olivia sitting in the living room on the couch. She has piles of homework in front of her, and the clock behind the couch reads 11:00 P.M. The couch is moved to stage right and it appears to be cut in half. Amy is sitting on a chair on stage left painting her nails. The girls are on the phone with each other.
Olivia- I don’t know what to do Amy, I am just so overwhelmed with everything. With work, homework, basketball, school, Devon breaking up with me, stuff at home. It’s awful! I can’t handle it, but I don’t have a choice. It’s not like I can stop going to school or work. What do I do Amy; I’m like going to have a nervous break down or something?
Amy- Oh, I know what you mean girl. I mean, I don’t have as much stuff going on as you, but I get overwhelmed with the stuff I have to do. Sometimes life just sucks. Can you believe that Jason and I broke up? I am still in shock.
Olivia- Yeah, well Devon left me too, and then told me that he was already seeing someone else. I hate guys sometimes. I hate life right now. I wish I could just drop everything and get away. What do you do when you get overwhelmed? I need help Amy.
Amy- Haha, I usually get a beer and just chill. Jason would usually smoke pot or something stupid like that. That stuff is horrible for you and smells awful. I would just drink a beer or some vodka and after a while, it would all be good.
Olivia- Yeah, not happening. My mom would kill me if she caught me drinking. Any other suggestions?
Amy- I don’t know what to tell you Olivia. Why don’t you go out with me tomorrow night and I’ll get you drunk. It will be fine and your mother will never find out. I promise you will feel better. You just feel so happy when you’re drinking.
Olivia- I don’t think so Amy. I had better go; I have so much homework to do tonight. I’ll see you tomorrow.
Amy- Alright girly, have fun. Don’t forget to meet me at my locker tomorrow morning.
Blackout
Scene 3
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. The couch is up stage center in its original position. The piles of homework are still all over the coffee table and Olivia is asleep on the couch. There is a bottle of what appears to be some form of alcohol on top of one of the piles of homework and it is almost empty. Nikki and Drew enter from stage right. They are all ready for school and wearing their backpacks.
Nikki- Is Olivia sick? Is she not going to school today?
Drew- I don’t know. Maybe we should wake her up.
They both walk over to Olivia and Drew shakes her to wake her up.
Drew- Olivia, wake up. Are you going to school today? We have to leave in 5 minutes or we’re going to be late.
Olivia- (Still pretty much asleep and very out of it. It is noticeable that she has a hangover) Ughhh. Shhhh. What time is it? (She doesn’t move)
Nikki- Its 7:30. Are you okay Olivia? You look pale.
Olivia- (she starts to get up) I don’t know. I’m not feeling very well. I think I’m going to throw up and my head is killing me. (She remembers the bottle, grabs it, and hides it behind her back. Nikki and Drew don’t seem to notice.)
Drew- Maybe you should stay home. I’ll call mom and tell her.
Olivia- No! No, Drew. I’m fine. I’ll go to school. Let me go get ready. You guys take the bus today alright? I’ll drive myself that way if I’m late you guys won’t be.
Nikki- Are you sure? If you’re sick you really should stay home. You don’t look good at all. Mom wouldn’t mind if you stayed home.
Olivia- No. I have to go. Just go get on the bus. I’ll see you guys later.
Nikki and Drew give up trying and exit stage Left. Olivia starts massaging her head to try to ease her headache. She then grabs her mouth and stomach as if she is going to be sick and runs off stage right.
Blackout
Scene 4
The scene opens to Amy and Olivia standing in front of a set of lockers. A few other students are standing around talking as well.
Amy- So Jason tried texting me this morning. What is his issue? He breaks up with me yesterday and then begs for me to come back to him this morning. That boy needs to make up his mind. But of course I took him back. He’s just too cute to say no to, and I swear I’m going to be with him for like . . . ever. (She finally looks up at Olivia who is still very pale, her hair is a mess, and her make up is smeared) Wow . . . you look awful. Are you okay? Did you sleep last night? Are you sick?
Olivia- Something like that.
Amy- What do you mean? Are you okay? Talk to me!
Olivia- (She sighs) I listened to your advice last night. I drank almost an entire bottle of. . .I’m not even sure what it was. It tasted awful at first, but after a while I couldn’t stop and then I just passed out. I woke up this morning feeling awful. I still feel awful. Amy, I thought you said I would feel better? I feel worse!
Amy- You have a hang over Olivia. It happens when you drink too much. Just drink a lot of water and you’ll be fine. You don’t feel great now, but didn’t you feel good last night? Didn’t you feel relieved?
Olivia- Well . . . I’m not sure I remember. All I know is I didn’t finish my homework so I’m in big trouble.
Amy- Haha, you’re so funny sometimes. So do you want to go out tonight? I’m sure I could hook you up with one of Jason’s friends.
Olivia- I don’t think so Amy. I don’t ever want to drink again, after today I am never touching another drop of alcohol. Ugh.
Amy- I promise you get used to it, and it’s not so bad after a while. But I understand that you’re busy. But really girl, I think you should go take a look at yourself in the bathroom. Did you even look at yourself this morning? You’re a mess!
Olivia- I was in such a rush I didn’t have time really. Not to mention the light hurts my head even more!
Amy- (Randomly) Why don’t we cut school today?
Olivia- WHAT?
Amy- Yeah, we could both use a break. Why don’t we just go hang out some where? It would give you time to finish your homework and get over your hangover. You really need a day off.
Olivia- Do you know how much trouble we could get it? Besides, if I miss a day of school to do my homework, I will have even more homework by not being here. Since when do you skip school anyways?
Amy- Well I’ve never actually done it before, but I think we deserve it. It could be fun and who else would I want to spend my day off with than my best friend!
Olivia- Oh, I don’t know Amy. . .
Amy- Come on, you know you want to. Heck, you know you need it!
Olivia- Alright, but just this once. This is the first and only time okay?
Amy- Yes! Okay, definitely. Let me just call Jason to see if he wants to come along. Maybe he’ll bring one of his friends. (she puts her cell phone to her ear and starts talking to Jason) Hey baby, I was just wondering. . .
Olivia- . . . but I thought . . . oh never mind. (She sighs)
Amy- Okay great, we’ll meet you out by my car. Love you Pooky, kiss kiss.
Blackout
Scene 5
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. It is dimly lit to show that it is late at night and the clock reads 11:00 P.M. Olivia enters from stage left tip toeing in and trying to be as quiet as possible. She closes the door quietly and as she does that the lights come up to show that her mother has turned on the light. Debbie comes in and stands center stage. She is very upset and is wearing a long bathrobe. Olivia looks at her mother and knows she is in trouble.
Debbie- Where in the world have you been?
Olivia- (slurring her words and acting very drunk) Out with Amy.
Debbie- Why didn’t you call? You know your coach called me. He is very upset and may kick you off the team for missing practice. You didn’t tell me how much trouble you have been having with basketball. Where were you all night? I was worried sick! I was almost ready to call the cops!
Olivia- I was out with Amy mom, I’m fine. I’m gonna. . .I’m gonna go to bed now. G’night.
Debbie- Not so fast. What is going on with you? (Walks up to Olivia) You don’t look so good, are you feeling alright?
Olivia- Yeah mommy, I’m fine. I’m sleepy. I’m gonna go to sleep now.
Debbie- Why do I smell alcohol on your breath? Have you been drinking?
Olivia- Never! No, I’m not drinking at all!
Debbie- Oh my god, Olivia you’re drunk! What is the matter with you? Where have you been all night?
Nikki and Drew enter from stage Right
Nikki- What’s going on? Why were you yelling mommy? Is everything alright?
Debbie- Everything is fine Nikki, just go back up to bed. You both have school in the morning.
Drew- Is Olivia sick? She didn’t look so good this morning. She said her head hurt and she felt like she was going to throw up.
Debbie- What? Olivia, were you hung over this morning? What is going on here? I demand that you tell me right now!
Olivia- Nothing is going on. I’m just tired. You’re not listening. I’m not sick, I’m perfect! I’m absolutely perfect mom! (she begins to laugh hysterically)
Nikki- Mommy, what’s wrong with Olivia? Why is she acting funny?
Debbie- Nikki, Drew, go upstairs. I have to talk to Olivia. Go to bed.
Nikki and Drew look at each other with looks of concern and then turn and exit stage Right.
Olivia- Mom, I don’t feel. . .so good.
Debbie- What the hell were you thinking? Going out drinking on a school night? Coming home drunk? What has come over you? I don’t even know what to say or do.
Olivia- I think I’m going to be sick.
Debbie- You’re so grounded! You will not be going anywhere except for school, work, and practice. Do you understand me? And you will be bringing your brother and sister to school everyday from now on. There will be no cell phone and no seeing Amy for a while. I just don’t even know what to do with you. I am so disappointed Olivia.
Olivia- Mom! (Olivia runs off stage right covering her mouth and stomach. Debbie is seen holding her head in defeat and then all you hear from off stage is a loud Blegh!)
Blackout
Scene 6
The scene opens to Olivia’s family living room. Olivia is sitting on the couch crying. The pile of homework is back on top of the table. The clock behind the couch reads 7:00 A.M.
Olivia- I don’t know what to do! I can’t handle this anymore. Nothing is getting better at all. This is only getting worse. Think Olivia, think! How stupid can you be? I am so stupid! How could I do this to myself? How could I do this to my mother? What am I doing! (She sobs) Okay, pull it together Olivia. How can I fix this? What do I do? (She sobs) Okay. I’ll quit the basketball team! No. . . I can’t do that. They need me. I need basketball for college. I could quit my job! No. . .I can’t do that either. I need the money for my car and they need me there too. I can’t let them down like this. Well I can’t quit school. (She picks up a bottle of alcohol that was on the floor and takes a big sip. Then looks at the bottle.) Why am I drinking this? Why am I doing this to myself? Alcohol has only made everything worse! Okay, that I can do. This is the last time I am going to drink. THE LAST TIME! Then I will really focus. Basketball season is almost finished. I can do this. I can do this. I just need to take a step back and focus. (She looks at the bottle) The very last time! Olivia, you can do this. It’s going to be alright. (She chugs down the rest of the bottle.)
Nikki and Drew enter from stage right all ready for school again.
Nikki- Are you ready Olivia?
Drew- Are you alright? Have you been crying?
Olivia- (She wipes her eyes and hides the bottle in the couch) Yeah, I’m fine. Let’s go guys.
Debbie enters from stage right.
Debbie- (To Olivia) Good, you’re up. Remember, come right home after school.
Olivia- I will mom.
Nikki, Drew, and Olivia exit stage left. Olivia had left her backpack on the floor by the coffee table and Debbie notices it and picks it up.
Debbie- (Walking off stage left yelling) Olivia! Wait! You Left your backpack!
A car crash is heard.
Debbie- (Yelling, and in hysterics) No! Olivia! No!
Blackout
Scene 7
The scene opens to Debbie, James, Amy, Mr. Stalwart, Mr. Write, Mrs. Parfait, and Devon all standing around a coffin. They are all wearing a black for the funeral. They are all crying.
Amy- (To Debbie and James) I am so sorry. This is all my fault. None of this would have happened if it weren’t for me.
Debbie- It’s not your fault Amy. No one caused this, and no one could have stopped this (She sobs)
James- Why didn’t you tell me what was going on Debbie? I’m their father! You should have called me as soon as you found out she was drinking. Maybe I could have done something.
Debbie- I’m sorry! Okay! I didn’t know how bad it was. I didn’t know what to think. This is all my fault okay? Our baby. . .our children. . .I didn’t do enough. I’m a horrible mother. (She sobs)
James- How are Nikki and Drew?
Debbie- Not good. They’re both in a coma and the doctor said they may never wake up, and if they do they will both have severe brain damage. What am I supposed to do James? All my kids are . . . what do I do?
Amy, who has been listening to the conversation, runs off stage left.
James- I don’t know Debbie. I don’t know. (He sighs) It’s going to be alright. We’ll get through this. Nikki and Drew are going to make it. It’s going to be alright. (He hugs her.)
Debbie- (She walks up closer to the coffin and puts her hand on it) I love you Olivia. I’m sorry that I didn’t see what was going on. I’m so sorry. I’m going to miss you baby girl. We all will. I love you. (She sobs.)
Everyone walks off stage right and the lights dim. The spot light is left on the coffin.
Blackout
Monday, November 30, 2009
Who Am I?
A very special person today told me to be myself. . .be myself? Who am I? That was what I thought immediately and I began to cry. I honestly don't know anymore. I used to know. I knew exactly who I was, what I wanted. . .and everything. I've always been a planner, I'm not a person that can live for the moment. I've been planning out my life since kindergarden, and just recently things began to change. I broke down crying when I decided to change my major. . .because that meant a change of plans. I had to change what I wanted to be for the rest of my life, and I know that seems stupid, but its a big deal to me. My future is almost set in stone for me in my mind. . .and when things get changed its almost like losing part of my past. I'm still some what unsure about my future as far as what I want to be. . .but I know the general direction. I know I want to help people, I want to impact lives, and make a difference. I guess in my mind I think that if I can save just one persons life it will make up for the one that I couldn't save. . .But back to the original question. . .who am I? Lets see:
My name is Jocelyn Marisa Oeser (Jocie)
My birthday is January 22
I'm female
Brunette
5'7''
fair complected. . .these are all physical. . .they make up what I am. . .not who I am. . .so who am I?
I like art, and music, and theatre. I like cute little animals, especially when they're sweet. The stars, and the brain intrigue me. I enjoy songs that make me cry, and pictures of tranquil and serene landscapes. Children make me smile, especially when they're smiling. I don't paint my nails, I don't enjoy it anymore. I'm addicted to my cell phone and my computer, they're like limbs. My favorite food is eggplant and my favorite color is crimson. I like to sing in the car, or when I'm alone. In my mind, swimming is comparable to flying. Google has become my bestfriend. I didn't eat meat for 3 years. . .and it still grosses me out from time to time to be honest. Religion confuses me and surrounds me. I wish I could paint. I enjoy school :0. I'm eccentric, sensitive, and flirty :D I enjoy writing and I'm not afraid to tell people how I feel unless I think it will upset them, or make them feel bad. I hate upsetting people, I take it very personally. I love families and dreaming. I love to talk about the future, and what my "ideal" life would be. I have nightmares almost every night now, but I've gotten used to most of them. I have a crush on a teacher ♥ and I read the twilight series. I love to read! I've been hurt many times. My dad left me when I was a baby. . .he never wanted me in the first place. He always made promises that he couldn't keep and I never understood why he couldnl't love me. My mom is my hero! My cousin died when I was 15 and my life has never been the same. . .I think about her everyday. I don't really write stories or anything anymore like I used to because I can't. . .it all ends up being about her. My play is sort of a combination about my life and hers. Its hard for me to trust people. I hate shaving. . .just ask BJ, he felt my legs when we went swimming together lol (i know its gross). I can't sleep with out my bra on. . .its like a security blanket. I wish I could play the piano. Thats me in a nut shell. . .and what do I want out of life? All I want is happiness. . .for me, and everyone around me. I'm scared to death of making a decision that will negatively effect someone around me. I wish I could know the outcome of my decisions before I make them, but I can't. . .so its all guess and check. I want to fall in love, graduate from college, get married, have a few kids, and life a happy life. I don't want my children to ever have to suffer or go without. Thats all I want. Seems simple right?
My name is Jocelyn Marisa Oeser (Jocie)
My birthday is January 22
I'm female
Brunette
5'7''
fair complected. . .these are all physical. . .they make up what I am. . .not who I am. . .so who am I?
I like art, and music, and theatre. I like cute little animals, especially when they're sweet. The stars, and the brain intrigue me. I enjoy songs that make me cry, and pictures of tranquil and serene landscapes. Children make me smile, especially when they're smiling. I don't paint my nails, I don't enjoy it anymore. I'm addicted to my cell phone and my computer, they're like limbs. My favorite food is eggplant and my favorite color is crimson. I like to sing in the car, or when I'm alone. In my mind, swimming is comparable to flying. Google has become my bestfriend. I didn't eat meat for 3 years. . .and it still grosses me out from time to time to be honest. Religion confuses me and surrounds me. I wish I could paint. I enjoy school :0. I'm eccentric, sensitive, and flirty :D I enjoy writing and I'm not afraid to tell people how I feel unless I think it will upset them, or make them feel bad. I hate upsetting people, I take it very personally. I love families and dreaming. I love to talk about the future, and what my "ideal" life would be. I have nightmares almost every night now, but I've gotten used to most of them. I have a crush on a teacher ♥ and I read the twilight series. I love to read! I've been hurt many times. My dad left me when I was a baby. . .he never wanted me in the first place. He always made promises that he couldn't keep and I never understood why he couldnl't love me. My mom is my hero! My cousin died when I was 15 and my life has never been the same. . .I think about her everyday. I don't really write stories or anything anymore like I used to because I can't. . .it all ends up being about her. My play is sort of a combination about my life and hers. Its hard for me to trust people. I hate shaving. . .just ask BJ, he felt my legs when we went swimming together lol (i know its gross). I can't sleep with out my bra on. . .its like a security blanket. I wish I could play the piano. Thats me in a nut shell. . .and what do I want out of life? All I want is happiness. . .for me, and everyone around me. I'm scared to death of making a decision that will negatively effect someone around me. I wish I could know the outcome of my decisions before I make them, but I can't. . .so its all guess and check. I want to fall in love, graduate from college, get married, have a few kids, and life a happy life. I don't want my children to ever have to suffer or go without. Thats all I want. Seems simple right?
Friday, November 27, 2009
I Had A Dream.
I dreamed last night that I was running. I was being chased, or at least something was following me. I would look back from time to time, but I couldn't see what it was. I was scared. I was crying. Everything around me was attacking me. The world was against me. The world wanted me for dead. I didn't know where to go, but I kept running. There was a path in the forest, I followed it. There was nothing else to follow. Nothing seemed safe.
There was a man in the forest right in front of my path. He just stood there looking at me. He had this strange look in his eyes. I thought it was rage, hatred, pain. I was scared, I thought this was it, but I kept running. My body wouldn't let me stop.
I ran right into the mans arms. I continued to cry, and shake with fear, and the man still held me. It was then that I realized it was you. You were the man I ran to. You held me tight and for the first time I felt safe. Your arms were strong and warm, and you just held me as I cried. You protected me from the demons, and all my fears. I held on to you as tight as I could, I feared that if I let go, you would disappear.
After a while I stopped crying and I stopped shaking. I looked up at you, and you still had that look in your eyes. I realized that it wasn't rage, hate, or pain. It was the look of love, and passion, and lust, and desire.
I will never forget that look.
I will never forget your warmth.
I will never forget your strength.
I will never forget you, because you are my safety, my protection, and my love.
There was a man in the forest right in front of my path. He just stood there looking at me. He had this strange look in his eyes. I thought it was rage, hatred, pain. I was scared, I thought this was it, but I kept running. My body wouldn't let me stop.
I ran right into the mans arms. I continued to cry, and shake with fear, and the man still held me. It was then that I realized it was you. You were the man I ran to. You held me tight and for the first time I felt safe. Your arms were strong and warm, and you just held me as I cried. You protected me from the demons, and all my fears. I held on to you as tight as I could, I feared that if I let go, you would disappear.
After a while I stopped crying and I stopped shaking. I looked up at you, and you still had that look in your eyes. I realized that it wasn't rage, hate, or pain. It was the look of love, and passion, and lust, and desire.
I will never forget that look.
I will never forget your warmth.
I will never forget your strength.
I will never forget you, because you are my safety, my protection, and my love.
Did you know?. . .
Did you know that you inspire me?
Your words are like a drug that send me whirling though a psychadelic state.
The sound of your voice harmonizes with the song of my soul.
Your lips taste like heaven, but burn through me like hell.
Your eyes catch and hold me tight, and I will never leave.
Did you know that I love it when you listen to me speak? When all I hear is your breathing and all I see is your smile.
I love it when you're near me. When all I feel is your warmth, and all I smell. . .is you.
Did you know that I'm not sure I could love you more than I do because my heart might just explode? Or the world might end?
But if the world does end, my love, I will still love you. I know I will live forever in your heart, and you will live forever in mine.
Did you know that I started writing because of you? I used to write before, but stopped when that part of me died. You know what I'm talking about. I could no longer get the words out. I could no longer show myself that way. Until you. You inspired me. You healed the part of me I needed to write again. I can write about love again, but more, I can feel love again.
Did you know that I am yours? I gave you my heart, my soul, my body. That is my gift to you, the only one I can give that is worthy. You gave me more than I deserve and I cannot meet that because you deserve the world. So I give you my love.
Did you know?
Your words are like a drug that send me whirling though a psychadelic state.
The sound of your voice harmonizes with the song of my soul.
Your lips taste like heaven, but burn through me like hell.
Your eyes catch and hold me tight, and I will never leave.
Did you know that I love it when you listen to me speak? When all I hear is your breathing and all I see is your smile.
I love it when you're near me. When all I feel is your warmth, and all I smell. . .is you.
Did you know that I'm not sure I could love you more than I do because my heart might just explode? Or the world might end?
But if the world does end, my love, I will still love you. I know I will live forever in your heart, and you will live forever in mine.
Did you know that I started writing because of you? I used to write before, but stopped when that part of me died. You know what I'm talking about. I could no longer get the words out. I could no longer show myself that way. Until you. You inspired me. You healed the part of me I needed to write again. I can write about love again, but more, I can feel love again.
Did you know that I am yours? I gave you my heart, my soul, my body. That is my gift to you, the only one I can give that is worthy. You gave me more than I deserve and I cannot meet that because you deserve the world. So I give you my love.
Did you know?
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Thanksgiving
So its thanksgiving and this is what i'm thankful for:
my family of course because where would I be without them.
my friends I couldn't have survived these last few years with out them.
my health. . .well. . .sorta. . .lol i haven't exactly been the healthiest person in the world this year.
my car. . .enough said
my life, it hasn't been the easiest one, but it's been one hell of a ride.
my ipod, it helps me to block people out :D
My ability to read, write, walk, stand, look around, breath, touch, smell, taste and all that good stuff. Life wouldn't be as much fun or as barable with out these abilities.
I'm thankful that I'm not starving, dying, an orphan or homeless.
my family of course because where would I be without them.
my friends I couldn't have survived these last few years with out them.
my health. . .well. . .sorta. . .lol i haven't exactly been the healthiest person in the world this year.
my car. . .enough said
my life, it hasn't been the easiest one, but it's been one hell of a ride.
my ipod, it helps me to block people out :D
My ability to read, write, walk, stand, look around, breath, touch, smell, taste and all that good stuff. Life wouldn't be as much fun or as barable with out these abilities.
I'm thankful that I'm not starving, dying, an orphan or homeless.
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